When we part ways with someone who has played a significant role in our lives—whether family, friends, or partners—it can feel like navigating uncharted waters. A part of us wants to hold on, clinging to the familiarity of what once was, while another, wiser part knows when it’s time to let go.
I’ve noticed that, often, we try to rewrite the past when a relationship ends. We take the love, the laughter, and the connection and twist them into bitterness. We cast the person as a villain, reducing them to a one-dimensional figure of pain rather than remembering them as the multifaceted human we once cherished.
Why do we do this?
I think it’s a defense mechanism. If we paint over the good with anger, if we convince ourselves they were never worthy of our love or respect, maybe it won’t hurt as much. Maybe it will be easier to move forward. But at what cost?
Tainting the past doesn’t heal the wound—it only hardens our hearts. It closes us off from unconditional love and keeps us from living in a state of peace and happiness.
Being human is about learning and evolving. Think about how much you know now that you didn’t five years ago—now consider how much exists that you don’t even know you don’t know. Life is a constant unfolding, and with every discovery, we shift.
Our interests change. Our passions expand. Our perspectives deepen. And as we grow, so do the people around us—just not always in the same direction. That best friend from high school, that partner you once felt inseparable from, may no longer align with the person you are today. And that’s okay.
It’s okay to outgrow relationships. It’s okay to move forward without resentment. It’s okay to still love and respect them, even from afar.
Not only is it okay—it’s necessary.
Every person who has touched your life has shaped you in some way. They were a chapter in your story, a stepping stone on your path. Even if the ending was painful, you don’t have to turn the memories into poison.
Letting go doesn’t mean erasing the past. It means honouring what was, embracing what is, and making space for what’s to come.
You lose people. Some are only in your life for a season or two.
We grow, we change, and so do the people around us.
Sometimes we disconnect and reconnect; other times, we’re only meant to cross paths to teach each other lessons and then move on.
Learn to accept all of it—the ebb and flow of life.
Reminiscing on the good times, the love shared, and all that we learned is a beautiful thing.
Just because someone is no longer part of your daily life doesn’t mean you can’t still love them. Whether it’s family you’ve stepped away from, friends you’ve lost touch with, or partners you’ve parted from—honour the love, the joy, and the lessons they brought into your life.
